This 2.5 hour video program teaches parents, educators, and caregivers how to Emotion Coach children in 5 simple steps.  By increasing emotional awareness and communication skills, this program improves your emotional responsiveness and, in turn, creates emotionally intelligent children.  Recorded before a live audience in Seattle, the videos are divided into 6 chapters that each contain an informative discussion from Drs. John and Julie Gottman, along with invaluable “Try This” exercises that are outlined in the accompanying parent workbook.  After completing the program you’ll have a good understanding of what emotional intelligence is, why it’s important, and how to use the 5 key steps to help establish a solid emotional foundation for your child.

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About Emotion Coaching

Without good information and the right skills, parenting can feel overwhelming. Parents often wonder: “What is one thing I could do for my child that would make a difference both now and in the future?”  The answer, found after more than twenty years of research, is to build your child’s emotional intelligence.  This means helping kids understand their emotions by recognizing what they are feeling and why.  To do this, parents need to teach their children to address feelings in constructive ways so they can eventually regulate their own behavior.  As children mature, the ability to manage emotions helps them navigate social relationships, maximize intellectual success, and develop confidence.  That’s the key: to provide a child with skills that set him up for positive social and emotional development – in childhood and beyond. Dr. John Gottman named these skills Emotion Coaching, a term that emerged in 1990 after 20 years of research on relationships, families, and parenting styles, and they are fundamental in creating respectful, emotionally healthy, successful kids.

 Successful parenting begins in your heart, and then continues on a moment-to-moment basis by engaging your children when feelings run high, when they are sad, angry or scared. The heart of parenting is being there in a particular way when it really counts.

A Path to Success and Well Being

The primary reason kids do well in life isn’t because of IQ, race, gender, athletic ability, genetics, or money.  Instead, studies show, it’s how parents connect with them when they’re sad, angry, or scared that matters most.  This is the heart of Emotion Coaching, a parenting style that creates positive effects on the behavior, health and potential of our children.

Dr. Gottman’s research has shown that Emotion Coached children:

  • Perform better academically
  • Have fewer behavioral problems
  • Have fewer infectious illnesses
  • Are more emotionally stable
  • Are more resilient
  • Can focus attention and motivate themselves

What will I learn?

My child is having a hard time

At the end of this program, you will be able to:

  • Understand the importance of Emotional Intelligence
  • Learn how to recognize, respond to, and validate what your child is feeling
  • Learn how to be an effective Emotion Coach using the Five Steps of Emotion Coaching with kids of any age
  • Discover ways to express understanding and empathy
  • Learn how to set limits and problem solve with children


How Emotion Coaching Works

Some approaches to modifying child behavior fail to address the feelings beneath that behavior.  It’s easy to forget that emotions are an essential survival mechanism, nature’s way of guiding us through life.  They help us learn to trust our perceptions, determine our safety, understand our needs, and make meaning of our experience.  Emotions are meant to be felt, and acknowledging them is crucial to well-being.

But how people feel about emotions affects how well they parent.  They may love their children deeply, and yet continually dismiss or criticize certain feelings, setting the stage for their kids to become alienated from themselves and others. This is why Emotion Coaching is so important: it provides parents and caregivers with a 5-step method to support healthy social and emotional development — in childhood and beyond.

What if I have children of different ages?

The good news is that no matter how old your child – it’s never too late.  Whether your parenting focus is with toddlers, tweens, or teens (or maybe you have children in each stage), the goal is to engage and connect at your child’s current level and never give up.  Your children will always need you, even if they don’t express their need for you at the moment.  Using these tools for emotional connection and Emotion Coaching can make a big difference.

Emotion Coaching  = simple steps

If you’re like many parents, the challenge is that you may not have been raised with emotionally aware parents, so you don’t know what to say or do.  The Emotion Coaching Program speaks to the blind spots all parents have by teaching 5 simple steps for coping constructively with your child’s feelings.  Once you learn the art of Emotion Coaching and put a supportive foundation in place, your parenting may be a little easier.  When emotions arise, you will be much more successful at recognizing different emotions, communicating needs, setting limits, and problem solving.

Emotion Coaching positively influences how kids feel about themselves and the world!

Once you put the foundation in place, your child will eventually become your ally and you will solve problems together.  He or she will be more likely to come to you, confide in you, and see you as a source of support, understanding and wisdom.

Read a recent article on the importance of Emotion Coaching here 

About The Gottman Institute

The work of The Gottman Institute is based on the distinguished research and clinical methodology of Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman.  Our mission is to create great relationships and to help repair troubled ones, using an acclaimed blend of science and practical therapy.  From a global network of Gottman-trained therapists to a wide selection of workshops, our programs and products strengthen couples, support new parents, and guide those seeking to “emotion coach” their children.  The Institute teaches educators and facilitators how to lead Gottman-themed workshops, and can arrange in-house professional training for organizations and staff members.  Visit for more information

About Dr. John Gottman  – Bio
About Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman  – Bio

The Research
Dr. John Gottman studied families for over twenty years to learn which kids were developing successfully and which were not. He measured how well the children performed in school, observed how well they related to their peers, and interviewed them to see how appropriately they behaved socially, and how they related to their parents. His team kept finding the same results: children who were Emotion Coached were more successful as adults on measures like peer friendships, gainful employment, and academic performance than were children parented in other ways. See Meta-Emotion Philosophy and Family Functioning, by Lynn Fainsilber Katz, John M. Gottman, Carole Hooven. Journal of Family Psychology 1996 Vol. 10, No. 3.